“Mistakes are a fact of life. It is the response to error that counts.”-Nikki Giovanni
We can be our own biggest critics and sometimes we are also our own biggest hurdles.
I was recently at a friend’s baby shower and during a quiet moment, I pulled the Father-to-Be to the side to give him my sincerest congratulations. We’d known each other since my freshman year of college and over the years I’d been deeply inspired by the man and now father that he’d become. After I’d lavished him with accolades and at-a-boys, he sheepishly grinned and said, “Yeah but you know how it is, it never feels like I’ve done enough.” I paused and replied, “Yeah, I’m familiar with that sentiment.”
While my friend had clearly not let the “it never feels like enough” sentiment keep him from continuing to live his best possible life- both professionally and personally; for others that “not enough” feeling can be downright paralyzing. The need to succeed is amplified even more than ever as we navigate the age of banter via social media. The ability to compare our own lives to the perceived success or lack thereof our family, friends, and peers is simply a text message, Facebook status, or Instagram post away. But as my friend Jovian Zayne once said, “We can’t live our lives based on someone else’s Valencia filtered reality.”
So how does one avoid the comparison trap? It starts once we acknowledge that our journey is in fact OUR own. Since no two people process ANY sensations in the exact same way, I’d encourage you to revel in your own experiences; and stop wanting the that of others. It wouldn’t feel the same anyway.
Here are my tips for getting out of your own way:
Post Positive Affirmations in Your Workspace
Having spiritual affirmations and inspirational quotes up at my desks at the office and home help to reground me throughout the work day. Whenever I’m feeling stressed or just simply need of a reminder of who I am, I take a moment to pause and regroup by looking at the statements that are simply a glance away.
Have Honest Conversations with Members of Your Personal Executive Cabinet
Your personal executive cabinet is the group of individuals that support, develop, advise and create opportunities for you along your professional journey. This should be the group of people that you trust to give you honest and relevant feedback and advice for your professional endeavors. You should leverage this group often, and especially when you feel like you might be getting in your own way.
Don’t Be Afraid to Unplug
Whether you opt to take a much needed vacation or simply commit to not logging in to any social media sites or applications for an entire weekend, there are times when we simply need to get away from virtual life and get out and enjoy ourselves in the world around us. It’s okay to step away from your newsfeed and be present for yourself in the now.
Author: Suzette Yasim Robotham
Suzette is a Human Capital Strategist and writes for LinkedIn Pulse